Common Views Parents Have of Their Kids

It’s September, and as parents, we are excited to have our kids go back to school (except for those parents who are first-year preschool parents, and are agonizing and missing their precious little one, but you’ll get over it.)

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You may catch yourself saying, “Your job is to be a student, so make sure you color in the lines.” Or, “Don’t forget your backpack!” And the redundant, “Do you have any homework?”

I’m not sure it’s developmentally helpful to put to much emphasis on your child ‘being a student – that’s your job.’ I think there can be a downside to that kind of speech. I think we want our child to be more than a student. What happens if he’s not good at school? Does that mean we fire him? Does he lose his ‘job’?

I’ve noticed that parents view their kids in three common ways, and how you look at your kid shapes how you parent him/her. Our perspective of our child influences our expectations, our communication, our discipline and our relationship with our child. I’ve observed that their are two very common ways parents view their kids, and in my opinion, these two can actually get in the way of a child developing to be a capable young person. I’ve also seen a third, healthier way to view and relate to our kids. Check out this short video to see the Three Ways Parents See Their Kids. 

 

Let me know what you think at tim@parentscoach.org